Always. Never. Everyone. No One. Everything. Nothing. Hyperbole? Part Four

Your Opinion Is Not My Reality ~ Steve Maraboli ~

© Kelly Jeanne 2022

I deplore hearing people at birthday parties of those who are up there in years saying something like, “Is today your birthdayyyy? How wonderful! Are you planning on eating a lot of ice cream and cake todayyyy? Good for youuuuu! You have a lovely birthday todayyyyy, okayyyy?

Over the years it has become so triggering for me that I literally have a hard time hearing what these people are saying. To me it sound like one long, high pitched, screeching sound; like someone’s nails across a chalk board. I can’t discern one word from the next.

If someone’s voice is naturally high pitched, it still bothers me, and it’s still hard to discern one word from another, but not as much. Only because I know they’re being sincere and not condescending. On the other had, if someone is deliberately being condescending, I I would much rather jump out a window than listen to that screeching in my ears.

There are those who are talked to in that manner, but don’t complain. For the most part, when this happens, it simply means they have the grace to handle it. It’s great to have the grace to put up with such communication, but that doesn’t make it any less hurtful, disrespectful and undignified. This also makes it difficult for those of us who do complain. I, personally, have been told all my life, “Well, no one else has complained.” Therefore, I treated as someone who is just being overly sensitive and in need of thicker skin. Ultimately, nothing is done. Nothing changes.

Another way to look at it is this. The recipient may not say anything because they’re simply tired of it all and don’t have the energy to deal with the ignorance of others. So, in lieu of blowing a gasket and risking a heart attack, they keep quiet. I don’t blame them. When I look on the faces of those who are talked to in such a manner, the look on their faces is one of resignation and my heart goes out to them. I also notice that as the ‘well wisher’ walks away, the eyes of the recipient follow them with a look that says, “If you only knew.”

As tired as I am with this ignorance from others, I’m not that old and I will say something about it every time. I hope I never have the grace to put up with and allow such disrespect from others. I’m not afraid to speak my mind. If it makes you uncomfortable, good! It’s supposed to.

Ask yourself, would you like to be talked to in such a manner? If you are honest, you would say no. So, if you don’t find this an attractive way of communicating then give others the same respect. Payback will come when you get older and find others younger than yourself, talking like that to you.

People who talk in absolutes or use extreme statements that sound quite implausible, and are continually making these statements with all sincerity, chances are very great that they are not saying these things for dramatic effect, or having a pity party, or wanting attention. It’s a sign that these words are coming from severe trauma and every word is true.

~ The End ~

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6 thoughts on “Always. Never. Everyone. No One. Everything. Nothing. Hyperbole? Part Four

    1. Ohhhh, Cathyyyyy!!!! 🤗 Remember your blood pressurrrrrre! 🤗
      Do you run across this on occasion in your life? When it does happen to you, do you leave a trail of dead bodies in your wake?
      None of us get to this age because we’re oblivious idiots.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. I have to admit I have avoided people and family gatherings, parties for many years now. ‘Plying pleasant platitides’ was never for me. I’ve noticed people not even listening to my reply when I respond and see them eyeing their next victim and wandering off before I’ve finished a sentence. I’ve never been comfortable in groups. I don’t have the energy or inclination now.

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    1. For me it’s gotten to the point where I look the person square in the eye and say, “Please don’t talk to me as if I were a child.”
      The reaction I get from them is they come off as if they’re the ones who’ve been offended.
      How do you handle it?

      Thank you for stopping by, purplesandyh!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Well they would be, they haven’t a clue what you mean. To them they are making polite conversation. The biggest release for me is accepting that people are where they are in life, understanding, development and have no idea they should change, or inclination.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. When someone talks to me in a condescending manner, they know exactly what they are doing. That is not polite conversation and they know it. It’s rude and disrespectful. This has been my experience my whole life from others.
    When I say, “Please don’t talk to me like I’m a child.” I’m asking them to respect me and the boundaries that I’m setting.
    When they get upset and turn it around as if I’m the one offending them, this is what’s called ‘gaslighting’. Making it seem that I’m the one with the problem. My family did this to me throughout my childhood.
    Another great indication that tells me it’s not polite conversation is this: When people talk to me like that, it makes me uncomfortable. It’s humiliating for me, as well as dehumanizing and degrading. It makes me want to cringe. That’s what matters.
    If I, as the recipient, feels uncomfortable and awkward with the way someone is talking to me, that’s an excellent indication that what they are doing is not good. It may be alright for them and it may be alright for someone else (although, I don’t know too many people who enjoy being talked to like they are stupid children), but it’s not alright with me.
    I should never say to myself, “Well, it’s alright with Sally, so I guess it should be alright with me.” If Sally doesn’t mind being talked to like that, that’s on her. Conversely, I wouldn’t expect Sally to live her life according to my rules, likes and dislikes. She shouldn’t expect me to do it either.
    So, to reiterate. Talking to someone in a condescending manner – as if they are stupid children – is not making polite conversation. It’s disrespectful. And when I request someone to stop doing something, they don’t have to agree with me. They just have to respect what I’m asking them to do. If they don’t want to, then I need to cut ties with that person. These are toxic people.

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